(And What Actually Sticks When the Sugar Dissolves)

Let’s be honest.

The spiritual world these days?
It’s like fairy floss.
Fluffy. Pretty. Kind of addictive.
And gone before you’ve even swallowed.

I’ve Been There

I wore the beads. Burned the sage.
Did 40 sun salutations a day.  Booked the coaching.
Chanted in candlelight like I meant it (and sometimes, I really did).

I signed up for all the things that promised freedom.
And part of me really believed it. It’s a damn good story we tell ourselves.
I thought — this must be it.
This must be what healing looks like.

And hey, I’m a trauma-informed coach. A yoga teacher.
Studying counselling. I know this world inside out.

Somewhere along the way, it all started to taste like empty sugar.
Not because it was fake.
But because it was floating — unrooted.
Missing the blood. The breath.
The dirt-under-your-fingernails truth of being human.

So even with all that…
It still didn’t touch certain places in me.
The ones that held the freeze.
The ones that weren’t ready to be fixed, just witnessed.

Because healing doesn’t come from the outside —
It might start there.
But the real work?
It happens inside.
Slowly.
Honestly.
From the guts out.

The “Just” Culture

“Just raise your vibration.”
“Just manifest it.”
“Just breathe.”
“Just let it go.”
“Just book another retreat in Bali.”
Just just just…

As if healing is a to-do list.
As if trauma bows out when asked politely.
As if the soul is a productivity app you can hack.

Let’s Get Real…

Healing isn’t clean. I wished it was.
It’s not tidy. Or photogenic.
It’s feral, sometimes.
It comes with cracked voices, swollen eyes, rage you didn’t know you had.
It takes time. And guts. And nervous system stamina.

The Crash After the High

Fairy floss spirituality feels amazing — for about a minute or two or a day.
That high after a breathwork session.
The cosmic tingles in a sound bath.
The tears you shed in a candlelit circle.
Beautiful moments. Sure.
But if there’s no ground underneath them?
If your body can’t actually hold the charge?
You crash.
And then you think something’s wrong with you.
Again.

What Actually Sticks

What lasts?
The slow stuff. The unsexy stuff.
The showing-up-with-your-whole-mess kind of stuff.

Allowing yourself to be fully human, with all the imperfect, emotional, contradictory, sometimes shameful parts — instead of trying to be “pure,” “spiritually evolved,” or constantly “positive.”

Not cleaning up your feelings or filtering your experience to make it digestible or aesthetic.

Not spiritually bypassing your rage, grief, jealousy, exhaustion, or neediness — but letting them exist in you without trying to fix or erase them too quickly.

Feeling what your body is actually carrying — and not bulldozing over it with a mantra.

The Real Holy Work

It’s not pretty.
But it’s holy.
It’s sacred.
Crying into your tea not because you’re broken —
but because you finally felt something real.

Not Against the Tools — But Go Deeper

I’m not here to bash the tools.
I love yoga, and breathwork, and retreats and all that good stuff.
But I’m done pretending that glitter is glue.

I want healing thats not a performance – but a practice.

I want healing that lasts.
That moves through the surface sparkle and down into the bones.
The kind that softens your jaw at 2 a.m.
That reshapes your reactions, not just your intentions.
That knows your trauma isn’t just in your thoughts — it’s in your fascia, your cells, your breath.

I want healing that works all the way through.
Layer by layer.
Back to the parts of you still holding your breath.
The parts that never got to speak.
The parts you’ve tried to bypass with light, but really need your love.

And if you’re wondering why you keep looping — why old patterns still grip you even after all the “work”?
Stay tuned.
Next time, we’re going there:

Stuck in the Old Ways? You Might Be Looping at a Cellular Level.

Come As You Are
Bring your bare feet. Bring your anger.
Bring your softness and your snot.
Let’s sit in the mud,
and call that holy.

Love Stefanie Anna

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(Add)

It’s all about moving beyond the performance of healing into the real work — trauma-informed, embodied, slow, nervous-system-rooted, and honest.

• 1. You can’t vibe your way out of a trauma loop.
  → But you can slowly rewire it through nervous system repair and real safety.
• 2. Cacao won’t fix your attachment style (but it’s tasty).
  → But consistent, attuned relationships can.
• 3. Energy healing won’t rewire your childhood.
  → But meeting your inner child with compassion and boundaries will.
• 4. You can’t breathe your way out of what you won’t feel.
  → But feeling it — fully, honestly, somatically — can set you free.
• 5. Sage can’t reach your inner 8-year-old.
  → But showing up for her again and again, can.